Army Men: World War

Let me start by asking a simple question: Are the soldiers in this (or any) Army Men game supposed to be human-sized plastic toys in the real world, or are they regular toy-sized guys and vehicles in a mini-version of the regular world? While you're thinking about that one, let me get on with my review. First, if you've just purchased this game, and are about to take it out of the packaging, for the love of all things holy, STOP!!! Drop it in that little shopping bag and take it on back to the store with the quickness. Get yourself something else--hell, exchange it for Spec Ops and put the rest of your hard-earned dough toward the pre-purchase of a PlayStation2. If you've opened it already...well, I'm sorry for not getting this review to you sooner. Army Men: World War is one of the bug-giest, unpolished games I've ever played. Polygons disappear, you get stuck on things, the Al is either dead-on accurate or as dumb as plastic, and the multiplayer is the antithesis of fun (it's often far too dark, pointless and lacks the innovation found in Army Men 3D's multiplayer mode). So does this thing have any redeeming qualities? Two things: the incredibly realistic sound effects, and the weapons (there's just something fun about mortars). I guess the missions aren't too bad either (infiltrating a prison camp, riding on a gun boat and what not). But then, I'm into this military/covert ops sort of stuff. All in all, it'd be best to steer clear of this one.

Countless glitches. Can't strafe. Dark, ugly graphics. Flawed concept. Pathetic Al. Frustrating gameplay. Whenever I cut loose with a stream-of-consciousness rant about Army Men: World War (and I've screamed plenty of random stuff while playing this sequel-just ask my coworkers), I can't for the life of me come up with one positive thing to say. OK, many levels are mercifully short. And, um, the sound effects are very nice. But otherwise the uninspired, sloppy gameplay here just ain't fun. Even the two-player game-which was the best thing about the original--has been dummied-down. Ugh. Stick with Medal of Flonor for your warfare fix.

Another month, another Army Men game. If you haven't been a fan of the series up until this point, Army Men: World War will do nothing to change your mind. Just as in Army Men 3D, World War has a lot of great ideas, but just falls on its face In execution. It's simply no fun at all when you have to replay each level over and over just to learn where every enemy is. And it's especially frustrating when your bullets just don't hit the enemies--even if they're right in front of you. Add to that some annoying camera angles and you'll quickly see why World War just doesn't work. The scary thing is, this could be such a killer game if it was done right.