Premier Manager 2006-2007

The Last Time I was in this much pain was when I inadvertently snagged a cluster of densely-packed hairs while attempting to dislodge a nasal blockage with a pair of pliers. In fact, given the choice, I'd rather delve back into those murky depths with a hacksaw than play Premier Manager 2006-2007again.

Amateurish beyond belief, you'd need a review spanning four phone directories to just skim over the plague of faults that blights this wannabe management game. Yes, I know, I know, it's not trying to be Football Manager, but that doesn't excuse its utter ineptitude to provide anything even vaguely approaching a football management experience. With its hideously clunky interface that sporadically stops working (meaning you get stuck on one screen and have to quit out of the game), a basic match engine that even on the slowest setting, runs so fast you may as well skip the matches entirely, and a shockingly inadequate tactics screen to boot. Premier Manager 2006-2007 has to go down as one of the most threadbare and cack-handed management games of the year.

Sure, there's a smattering of nice touches, such as players letting you know how they feel about your decisions, but ultimately, there's virtually nothing here to recommend whatsoever. Do yourself a favour and don't fall out with your hard drive by contaminating it with this dross.