9: The Last Resort

Produced By Robert De Niro, it says on the box. Yup, Bobby De Niro. 01' scrunchy eyes. Travis Bickle himself. Cuddles to his friends. And he produced Nine apparently. At least, that's what the marketing people would have you believe. Myself, I have a different theory. As always with the Famous Names Involved With Computer Games syndrome (now officially recognised by 84% of the world's doctors), the involvement is usually far less than it may seem. Often it's little more than a voice-over, but in this case it doesn't even reach those dizzy heights. Nine is produced by Robert De Niro's production company, which probably means that his involvement amounted to saying, Yeah, do one of them game things. Are you looking at me?

All is not lost, though, because to balance out the lack of Robert De Niro, we have the vocal talents of James Belushi, Christopher Reeve and Cher amongst others actually appearing in the game. So huzzah for that! Dignity is saved, honour is restored and perhaps I should stop waffling now and tell you about the game.

It'd be an idea...

It's a 7th GuestfMyst kind of thing. You've been left a strange hotel in your uncle's will and before you can take over the place you have to deal with the strange inhabitants that are left inside. Strange doesn't begin to describe them, though, as the hotel used to be a haven for weirdos all looking to unleash their creative energies however they see fit.

This means the hotel has been swamped by all sorts of odd puzzles for you to solve if you want to find your way out of it. On top of that, you have to deal with the twisted minds of a pair of evil twins who want the hotel for their j own plans (voiced by a couple of the guys from Aerosmith - apparently De Niro's name has some pull to it).

Nine has a lot of big-name pulling power behind it, but how it shapes up I in the gameplay department is anyone's guess at the moment. However, Myst-style games do seem to sell like hot cakes at a Fat Person's Convention so perhaps it'll surprise us all.