MTV's Celebrity Deathmatch
|a game by||Gotham Games, and Big Ape Productions, Inc.|
|Platforms:||XBox, PC, Playstation 2|
|Editor Rating:||5/10, based on 1 review, 2 reviews are shown|
|User Rating:||8.4/10 - 9 votes|
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|See also:||Arcade Games, WWE Game Download, Fighting Games|
Sometimes when a reviewer is giving a game a good solid kicking, they look down momentarily at the squirming piece of software beneath their feet and see a glimmer of what could have been in its petrified eyes. A sign that someone, long ago, once cared for it and felt that one day it would do them proud. It is then, with a feorrowful heart, that the reviewer bends down, reaches for its scrawny neck and puts it out of its misery.
There is no such welling up of tears for Celebrity Deathmatch. A marketing ploy for the semigood claymation MTV show of years past, Celebrity Deathmatch is the worst fighting game (and pretty much the worst game) I have ever insulted my hard drive with. For a start, the fighters are barely celebrities: Jerry Springer and Marilyn (Manson, they're acceptable. But Cleo, Shannen Doherty, Cindy Margolis, various Hammer Horror monsters and Carrot Top? My Dad was Sheep Farmer of the Year 1986, and that made him twice as famous on these shores than that lot put together.
But what about the fighting? Jesus! Not only did I complete all six episodes on medium difficulty in just over an hour, but the actual fights are such displays of mindless buttontapping hell that they do as much for the human spirit as the collected works of Nietzsche. The game is dire. Even the Mortal Kombat-styled finishers, in which spines are removed, heads explode and ribcages are played like xylophones, refuse to provide a laugh or a flicker of gameplay.
This is a lifeless corpse of a game. I'm giving it five per cent more than I should because Mr T is in it (and in any sane world all games would have MrT in them). But be warned: even limited exposure to this atrocity will numb your soul for evermore.
Download MTV's Celebrity Deathmatch
Celebrity Deathmatch is about as bad as the title suggests. I don't think there were a lot of people out there expecting this game would be anything near good but what is surprising is how it manages to be so bad without truly sucking in any one particular area.
Like the television show of the same name, Celebrity Deathmatch the video game pits a collection of famous and infamous people against each other in a no-holds-barred till the death ring fight. What made the television show an occasional hit was the fact that the writers for the show managed to come up with new and inventive ways for the ever changing list of celebs to off each other. That's problem number one with the video game; it's stuck with the same list of celebrities no matter how often you play it. On top of that, the subtle and not so subtle jokes created with their special moves really aren't all that funny even the first time around.
This game also suffers from truly lackluster controls. While they aren't bad enough to warrant a blistering review, they do little to make the game fun, giving Deathmatch a mushy sort of loose play. The fights are limited even more with a short list of attacks and a single quasi-defense.
Finally, Deathmatch doesn't offer much in the way of variety when it comes to how you play the game. You can duke it out one match at a time against a friend or the computer or you can go through the episode mode, which is basically the same thing with no choice of characters. The game's sloppy design becomes glaringly evident in the single match games where you have to basically start over to change your character with which you are fighting.
For some reason the game doesn't use the claymation style of the show and instead went with a bland cartoon look that manages to suck what little soul this game might have had right out of the box. Playing MTV's Celebrity Deathmatch is like watching a bad episode of the show and owning it is like watching that same episode over and over and over and over again. I think I'll pass.